Weeds 503 – Su-Su-Sucio

I know I’m not to punctual with these recaps, but hey, I made an international move.  Oh well, hope you enjoy anyway.  Still working on getting caught up.

Title Card Clue:

Soap and an out-door shower.  Okay…it’s got to be the one at their house.

Another morning for Nancy means another morning with Caesar.  She has a look of crazed annoyance on her face as she cracks her hard-boiled egg with a side of mustard and ginger ale.  I know they keep implying that she has morning sickness, but c’mon this is Weeds, lets just see her barf.

The barking door bell rings and enter Sucio.  We’ve seen Sucio before, but this is the first time I think we’ve heard his name, but don’t quote me on that.  He was the guy who first popped through the floor of the maternity store when Nancy discovers the tunnel, and most hilariously the guy Celia tried to buy cocaine off of when she stumbled down the tunnel with toilet paper stuffed up her bleeding nose.

Sucio is Nancy’s new babysitter.  My theory that Nancy is understands more Spanish than she lets on gets a major boost; Sucio asks Caesar where the dog is (referring to the doorbell), Caesar answers “Eating the egg,” both are speaking Spanish, and Nancy replies, calling him a “pendejo” (asshole).  Caesar warn her that besides his tunnel digging duties his real talent is torture.  Hmm, was he one the guys removing that other DEA agent’s face last season?  The one that gave up Nancy’s name?  I don’t remember, maybe one of you can tell me.

This is her constant face these days.

Nancy:  Wow, is it too much to ask that he takes a shower?

Caesar:  He’s comfortable with his man-smell.  Live with it.

Exit Caesar.  (I’m starting to get the idea behind the shower clue)

Down in ole Meheco, Celia is still playing house with Rudolpho (or is it Rudolfo? …idk).  He’s writing a ransom note for someone who has actual paying relatives.  Again, she wants to get all up in his shit and “help.”  Celia’s version of helping is micromanaging.  Methinks Rudolfo isn’t going to put up with much more of Celia.

Back at the house, Andy meets Sucio.

But it’s all cool, Nancy tells Sucio, “Brother in law…no shooty…Sucio, Andy.  Andy, Sucio.”  Andy makes a crack about Sucio’s name sounding like that Phil Collins tune Su-Su-Sucio, thus the episode title.  He gives her the lowdown on the weekend, minus the sister-fucking bit, but does mention that Jill is hot and just like Nancy, which she resents.  She goes to the bathroom, Andy is Andy and starts needling Sucio.  He responds by choking him.  Mwaha.

Nancy rushes out of the bathroom and declares she needs to go to the doctor.  We can easily guess this means bleeding.  In one of the smartest things I’ve ever seen her do, she takes Andy with her to Creepy Mexico Doctor.  Well, it’s only really creepy when Esteban is there, which he is.  P.S., I can see the sexual tension between Nancy and Andy growing.  My money is she’ll get the pregnancy hornies and he’ll be her only cure.  My only other wish is that Conrad would come back and foil Andy’s devious plans.  He kinda deserves karmic retribution for fucking Jill.

Anyway, the doctor says she fine, but she needs to stop stressing out.  Bad for the baby.  Esteban bitches her out about how her little emergency disrupted his day, and that if she didn’t stop stressing there would be consequences.  Um…yeah.  Andy sarcastically congratulates him on what a great father he’s going to be.  Not.

Nancy and Sucio arrive home (where the hell did Andy go?) and are surprised find Silas.  Silas is surprised to have a gun pointing at him.

Silas is aware of how mom rolls, however, and the shock quickly wears off.  Besides, he’s got other concerns, like trying to sweet-talk mom into backing his new venture–medical marijuana shop.  Which makes me wonder, where is Nancy getting cash from these days?  She shut down the tunnel aka her source of income, and I doubt Esteban would be handing her loads of cash either.  So why does Silas think she’s Mommy Warbucks?  Also, looks like Nancy and Sucio are BFF now, he carries her groceries, opens her peanut butter jars, it’s cute.  Despite her better judgment, and perhaps because Silas threw the “you made this the family business” guilt card, she agrees.  To how much we don’t know.  Silas and Doug are still partners even after their woods misadventure, and she warns him not to let Doug near the “product.”  Ha.

Shane magically appears, followed by Jill, who has thrown him out because he threatened to show her husband the pictures of her and Andy on the washing machine.  I love that Shane of all people is the one that delivers the “she banged uncle Andy” news.

“She’s a screamer.”  Ew.  Jill is right, Shane is a weird little pervert.  They bicker about who always bails who out and who’s a bigger bitch, but you can tell there’s no real hatred.  Haha, Jill asks if Sucio is the father, and Nancy just goes along with it.  Andy shows up (from magic lamp land) and is surprised to see Jill, who’s already ready for more.  She coaxes him up to his room, while Nancy gives him the death stare. She consoles herself by sharing a peanut butter and banana sandwich with Sucio, while her brother-in-law and her sister go to fuck under her roof.

Silas and Doug go to register their new business with the city.  No shit, they run into problems.  Turns out they need approval from local law enforcement.  Uh oh.

That night, the whole family, and Sucio, gather for family dinner.  Embarrassing tales from Nancy’s past make for excellent dinner conversation.  Jill tells the one about her affair with her middle school math teacher.  I love how Nancy turns and explains to Sucio each time she’s trying contradict Jill’s story.  She has cared less and less what her children think of her in these past few seasons, which part of me wishes she wouldn’t lose touch with.

Nancy finally shuts Jill up by pointing out how there’s no wild stories about Jill because she was boring.  It really bothers Jill.  Nancy tells her she’s just jealous.  Then she excuses herself to go throw up, Sucio pulls out her chair for her.  Jill delivers her best line after they leave, “I don’t mean to be judgy, but I mean, where did she meet that guy?  Home Depot?”

Flash down to Mexico, we see Celia getting snatched from her cot.  I knew her days with the Che Guevara wanabe were numbered.

The next day (I’m assuming) Silas and Doug go to seek the police chief’s approval for their pot club.  He’s flat out with them, he wants a cut.  Doug and Silas take an aside to figure out how they would like to be extorted, a flat monthly fee or a percentage of sales.  But dumb and dumber miscommunicate.  Doug is trying to tell him that the percentage would be bad for the cop and that he could cook the books for them, Silas doesn’t get it.  They wind up with the monthly payment.  Silas is stupid, maybe he should have finished high school, but they do get their signature.

At the house, Nancy has had enough of Stinky Sucio, and forces him into the outdoor shower.  Sucio looks…well, terrified.

Nancy goes upstairs to find him a loofah, his request (lol) and hears Jill and Andy at it again.  Gross.  She goes back to give Suico said loofah, but only finds his clothes and some blood.  Uh oh.

Nancy bursts in on Andy and Jill (with Shane looking over her shoulder, but hey I guess he’s seen this before) and gross, lets them finish, before telling them it’s time to get the hell out of there.

Celia wakes up on a bus at the boarder.  She asks the ICE officer demanding her passport where she is…”You’re in Texas, ma’am.”  Bwahaha..

At the house, Jill is being difficult about getting into the car.  She demands to know what is really going on and she wants in on Nancy’s exciting life.  We finally find out why Jill is really pissed at her.  She took care of their parents when they died while Nancy shirked responsibility.  Nancy apologizes.  Then Esteban calls, he’s very alarmed and says it’s not Guillermo’s guys, she’d be dead already.  He tells her to go to a safe place and wait for his call.  Jill is finally starting to realize she doesn’t want Nancy’s life after all.  She gets in the car.

As they leave we see Agent Till watching them from his car.  We know that’s who got Sucio, he wanted revenge for his murdered lover, the other agent.